Hello!

It's been about a year and a half! I have no idea whether or not I'll actually stick to updating this due to the upcoming busy-ness in my life (to be addressed momentarily), but nonetheless, I am here now.

Hope all's been well with everyone.

So ... new stuff!

I have been living in the Alberta Rockies since August '06 working at the Delta Lodge at Kananaskis. I'm a registered massage therapist in the spa here, and it's had its ups and downs, but in general this place has been good to me.

However, I'll be moving back to Halifax near the end of February. I do miss the ocean (my gods, Alberta is totally dessicating) and my family and friends ... and also want to be near them when I have my baby in March! I'm about seven months pregnant now (for those of you wondering about the timing, I'll explain in a private entry) and quite excited and nervous. If I do decide to regularly update again, I will soon be posting pics of me and my huge belly!

Well I've got some puttering around on LJ to do now as I have not been here for so long, so I'll see ya when I see ya.

Before you begin reading this, I have to admit that I am certainly not an expert on grammar. I just find the topic interesting and had fun putting together this entry. ( Ramble On. )

**UPDATE** I just spoke with Margaret Atwood after a reading she gave, and I asked for her opinion on what is happening with grammar these days, and I mentioned the lack of structure in text messaging and internet chat. She replied that text messages are symbols for meaning, in the same way that Standard English is, and so the message is still the same. She also noted that the increase in text messaging and use of the internet has precipitated an increase in literacy, as people need to know how to read in order to access most information on the internet, and in order to communicate in some way via text message. I told her that I have come to a similar conclusion myself.

Now here's an interesting little device. It seems like a healthier, more environmentally sound way to clean one's bottom. Check out the Biffy!

Today was the perfect day. Everything bloomed today. The leaves unfurled like so many banners announcing the coming summer. The sky overhead was covered by deep, dark clouds. Yet to the west the sky was clear, allowing the late afternoon sun to shine un-shadowed. The sunlight lit up the places in the distance where there were little patches of sun showers - I could see the rain coming down from the clouds, slanting toward the east in a mist. Everything felt good. I was relaxed, like I was when I was a kid. I felt comfortable in my own skin.

/cheesy ramble

First off, yes, I realize that I've not written anything in a dog's age, but in my defense I must say that I have been rather busy with my studies and my love life.

On to the reason for the entry ...

Has anyone here ever had the curious experience of writing something and putting it away, then reading it later only to discover that what you are reading seems completely new to you ... as though someone else had written it? I have just had this particular experience, as I have several times before and I though that I'd just ask around to see if anyone else I know has had the same experience.

I have read about this phenomenon before and I have heard of two explanations:

1) That when writing, one operates at a different level of consciousness and therefore one's personality is different than when interacting with people face to face.

2) That there are spirits who write their own words using people as tools or that guide people to a clearer, or simply different method of articulating one's own thoughts.

Please do comment!

Thanks to Mike (aka Gabe) over at Penny Arcade, I experienced my first laugh of the day despite the waves of nausea rolling through my tummy.

I could never do this to my pet - but it's funny to lookit.

(You can reload the page for different pics, too!)

Urrgh! Sometimes it just drives me batty how lumbar hyperlordosis seems to be in fashion among teenage/young adult girls. I know that this is a cartoon representation drawn by a male (and I must say that I very much enjoy his comic), but I see these type of females every where I go. >:( Stretch out your back! Stretch out your quads! Strengthen your damn abs!

Unless maybe they want to end up at middle age with a big hump on their upper backs when their heads naturally move forward to compensate for their insistence on sticking out their 'cute little bellies'.

/occupational frustration rant

Forty-One sleeps until I go away on a trip.

I am excited about each stop on the trip, but I've been thinking about a certain stop a lot lately ...

Soon I will be standing on a sand bar in the Caribbean Sea, holding chunks of tuna and waiting for the stingrays. There will be nothing but ocean on the horizon. If I walk too far to the edge, I will fall off the cliff of sand and fly out over a canyon in the ocean. Whenever I think about the stingray tour, I try to think about how fun it will be to play with them, feed them tuna in exchange for semi-domesticated-stingray kisses. Instead I find myself wondering about what is down there - down in the bottom of the sea-canyon. What scary creatures are lurking out there, waiting for the day when some hapless tourist falls off the edge of the pleasant light green water and into their deep, dark territory?

Hallo all!

Happy New Year to those for whom it is indeed the beginning of a new year!

I've just returned from a fabulous NYE masquerade party at somerled's house. What a lovely home he has! You should see the Christmas tree - very pretty with an elegant ribbon garland.

There were all sorts of weird and wonderful masks on parade at the party - there were a lot of fancied up 'lone ranger' style masks done up with beautiful arrangements of feathers; some amazing home-made masks such as those that thief_of_swords and angel_hamster wore; and some rather ... interesting choices, such as the fella who wore the ... ?ski goggles? ... There was a tie for my favorite mask though ... somerled's beautiful mask from Italy which reminded me of something from the masked ball in Labyrinth; and a fellow named Matt who made his own
Green Man (aka 'Obad Hai' in D&D) mask from leather!

It is now getting so late that I am beginning to feel hung-over so I must whisk away to bed. Thank you Patrick for a wonderful time, and a warm happy new year to you!

Snagged from delicata77's journal ...

This Is My Life, Rated
Life:	3.7
Mind:	3.5
Body:	4.5
Spirit:	6.3
Friends/Family:	2.9
Love:	0
Finance:	3.3
Take the Rate My Life Quiz

I stumbled upon this little gem while reading over some info about the drug which was prescribed to me by a GP, but which my aunt (a pharmacist) says should only be prescribed by a psychiatrist.

Here's the quote:

"Exactly how RISPERDAL works is unknown. However, it seems to readjust the balance of dopamine and serotonin."

Fuckin' brilliant. You say you're having trouble functioning at school and home? How about this - we don't know how it works, but here ya go! Let's start you off on 1.5 mg per day of a drug which is a powerful anti-psychotic and will cause you to feel nauseated, dizzy and unable to form coherent sentences and then tell you that this is what you need in order to live a normal life!

My aunt has advised me to stop taking the medication. I have.

My dear friend Charlotte just sent me a link to this little gem.

Here are some of my favorites ...

	Early 50's
	Dear Granny

aftermath Uhh ... happy Halifax explosion day ...?

Thank you so much to all of my friends who are being so supportive of me during yet another rough patch. I get myself into a nightmarish merry-go-round and have trouble seeing the big picture. I realize that I have made lots of mistakes, big and small, but so has everyone else. All I can do is try to be a better person moving forward.

My mum has been especially patient with me. In the end she's always there to dust me off and help me get back on the horse. She gave me some really good advice about how to deal with my feelings of paranoia and inadequacy when it comes to dealing with people one on one. It's a little mental trick I play on myself so that I can be calm and loving to anyone. I've tried it out today and I really feel that it's working.

You know, I'm starting to believe that it's true - the key to happiness is all about having the right attitude. I know that I am a very lucky person and that not everyone has so many wonderful people to support them when they're ready to give up ... but I really think that if you look at the big picture and how a certain situation fits into it, positive thoughts make all the difference. You don't have to sit in the boring old swan seat just because some mean kid pushed you off the white pony ... you can get out and switch to the dashing dapple grey horse or you can just take that palomino and ride it on outta here.

Thanks to the universe for sending me such wonderful people to travel with.

I apologize for the cheesiness of this post. I just finished watching Scrooged. That is my excuse. Of all the actors I've ever seen, Bill Murray is the most genuine, sane and beautiful. He makes me feel all sappy about how wonderful life really is.

Sometimes Halifax is just too damn small in that everybody is connected to everybody here, within two or three degrees it seems.

I may deserve the blame for many things, but this one is not my fault!

I really feel like an ignorant asshole. Selfish, bragging, vain and oblivious. I never seem to grasp how my actions and words will affect other people. It takes someone on the outside to show me how my actions and words caused a certain reaction from someone.

Do I just want to be this ignorant? Am I just a nasty selfish person? Do I simply refuse to learn from my mistakes? Do I really care about anyone or am I just looking out for myself? When I do things for people, am I just acting in the way I think I should? Am I condescending to people without realizing it?

I wish that people would tell me when they think I'm doing something hurtful or wrong. All of my life most people have been 'nice' and tiptoed around me when I just need a smack in the face. Anyone can think things about me or criticize me to others but it is a rare occasion that anyone actually yells at me or shows me what I am doing wrong. My wrongs just seem to slip away. Is this the way it is for everyone? Or do I have some natural reprimand repellent?

Can anyone be completely honest and tell me what I am doing wrong (and maybe even how to fix it)? Can anyone forget about being polite and just point blank tell me?

What have I become?

I found this lovely article on one of my favorite places to hang out and surf ... everything2. Here is an excerpt (which references one of my favorite authors) ...

"Spider Robinson once wrote about how he learned to give a good hug. (Paraphrased, but that avoids copyright problems anyhow.)

He was at a Science Fiction Convention when Theodore Sturgeon, who is apparently a master hugger, offered a hug. So Spider hugged him, and Theodore said, "Ah, a type A hug." Spider was puzzled by this term. As luck would have it, a fan of Theodore's work happened along, and Theodore offered a hug. After the hug, Spider observed him saying, "Ah, a type 1 hug." Curious about the meaning of the two terms, Spider asked Theodore what the difference was ..."

I'm looking for opinions here! It's only three questions - please do take this quick poll.

Poll #619816 the ethics of attraction
Open to: All, detailed results viewable to: All, participants: 10

Have you ever been attracted to more than one person at one time?

Have you ever had a relationship with more than one person at one time?

Do you think that it is wrong to be attracted to two people who are close friends?